Heart of Hearts
Kishara seemed to enjoy life. She loved God.
Jacob praised God for his life. He was free to be.
Although things were going really well, Kishara seemed detached. These were definitely exciting times. God had come through. He had made the way that she so desperately was trying to make happen herself.
For years Kishara prayed about the situation at hand; a passionate prayer to her Lord and God. Always in Jesus name. Kishara stated her wishes and concerns to God. Not forgetting to thank Him for bringing her this far. She meditated and then read some passages that the Holy Spirit led her to.
But in her heart of hearts, she never gave the issue over to God. Some part of her still worried and mulled over the situation. She didnít realize she was blocking Godís hand. He couldnít shield and protect her because of her own will to interfere. By not giving the request totally over to God, Kishara was not getting an answer from God. She was making her answers.
Kishara was juggling with the true confessed love of a convict. She couldnít admit to the suitor or to herself that she loved this man. She was unsure of whether or not he was ready for the seriousness Kishara would bring to his life. She required commitment in order to submit. Most importantly to this equation, she was fearful because they hadnít had a face to face meet. But in her heart of hearts, she was happy.
Kishara and Jacob were introduced by mutual friends who thought they would make a great compliment to each otherís lives. She was new to town and knew no one. Jacob became her confidant; over the phone. Until now, they had never met. But that mattered not. God had done the indescribable for each; Kishara was in love. Jacob trusted a woman.
Kishara had not so much as glanced at her future husbandís face. She only knew that when he was excited his voice quivered. And if he was nervous about something his tongue clicked continually throughout the conversation. She knew, by his description, he was a tall dark-skinned man of thin stature. She even knew his likes and dislikes. She knew he was a man of God. No, he didnít have a church home but he loved to praise God in everything.
So Kishara was just a bit nervous. She and Jacob were set to meet at six oíclock this evening. After four months of talking early mornings, mid dayís and late evenings over the phone, she would see his face. Most importantly, she would feel his presence. That concerned her most.
Would he like how she carried herself? How she wore her hair? Her decision making process? Would he think her reasoning was stable? Would he like her now that he can place his eyes on her? She was nervous but she was prayerful.
God okayed it. She knew there was something about Jacob that she was supposed to know him. Was she supposed to love him? Was she supposed to marry him? Did God think she could submit to this manís authority? These questions concerned Kishara because Jacob did have a past with the system. Did he plan to stay out? She wanted to be careful.
Jacob fell in with the neighborhood hoods. He was an intelligent boy but an irresponsible man. He paid for that. At 33 years of age he was now on the path of his purpose. He accepted responsibility easily these days. Jacob was in love with Kishara. He didnít know how something like that could happen over the phone. But he was sure of his love for this woman. No he hadnít laid eyes on her but he knew she was what he needed in his life and likewise what she needed in her life. He thought Kishara was a feisty woman who could be a little confrontational. She always spoke her mindís thoughts and ideas. In his heart of hearts, he knew she was for him.
Jacob smiled proudly at the thought of meeting Kishara. He wanted a wife. A companion. His soul mate preferably. Once he and Kishara got off the phone after their first conversation, he knew he was trouble. This woman got under his skin and his heart. She was well educated and had a great job. She was established. This scared him some but it didnít stop him. He knew she was out of his league but God said this was her. And he went with that notion.
He wanted to do so much with Kishara. Tonight they were meeting at Jimmy Deeís, Inc. They were taking a salsa dance class together. Although Jacob wasnít much of a dancer, he was excited about tonight. This would be a very different date. A woman had never suggested a dance class as the first date or any date for that matter.
Kishara pulled her Jeep Liberty into the lot. A tall dark caramel complexioned gentleman was walking in the building. She wondered if that was Jacob as she placed her vehicle in park.
As Jacob was coming out of the menís room, he noticed a beautiful black woman near the entrance to the ball room. His stomach lurched. This woman was very pleasant to the eye but seemed young to him so he perused the room until he came upon two other women. They fit the description. But after talking with the both of them he knew neither of these women were Kishara.
Kishara began walking toward the gentleman who she saw enter the building when she arrived. She knew he had to be Jacob because he seemed to be looking for someone with his eyes. She also saw him talking to two other black women who she favored. So she decided to get it over with.
Jacob realized that the beautiful woman from the entrance door was walking toward him. He breathed a silent prayer of gratefulness to God as Kishara introduced herself to him. He hugged and greeted Kishara. She is regal, he thought.
As Kishara was hugging this tall black man she now knew as Jacob, she mouthed thank you Lord to her smiling reflection from the mirror. The vibe was very comforting. He is regal, she thought.
Jacob and Kishara danced into each otherís life. They began dating exclusively. Three months after their first face to face meeting, Jacob asked Kishara to marry him. She said yes.
In their heart of hearts they knew they were walking in the authority and presence of God. And they lived in that grace and glory for the rest of their days.