Betrayal beneath the surface,
Within the desires of one's soul-
A never-ending fight to dismiss
My feelings, yet remain controlled.
Difficult is it to be in your presence,
Looking upon your heavenly face,
Without being lured under your spell,
And not my present love replace.
Everytime I stare into your soul,
And delve into the abyss of your mind-
I see more clearly what I need in you,
Yet there is a love that I leave behind.
The angelic chorale is embedded in your voice-
The splendor of the clouds are within your stride-
Golden raindrops fall upon me as you laugh-
Bid me, in your heart, reside.
How can I pursue a dream
A reality that seems so unreal?
How can I bring "us" to pass-
Yet not tell you how I feel?
For to speak these words so sweet
Would be a crime of high treason;
Despite my lady back at home,
I need not suffer death for no reason.
If I were to act this moment,
My heart to you I'd give;
But foolish would it be to take that risk,
When it's because of her that I live.
To turn my back on her now
Would prove me to be less of a man;
But would it be wrong to catch a dream
As you today, while I can?
To acquire the prized star in your eye
Is worth any mortal sacrifice-
And though I know you're the lady of my dreams,
My soul won't let me pay such a price.
It is my lady back at home,
Who still does fill me with much delight-
But it is you- the sweetened candy of my dreams-
That comforts and caresses me at night.
No night has seen the sunrise of dawnn
Without the thought of you having visited me-
And behold, I find everyday that we meet,
The hopes of us begets plots of infidelity.
For a love as pure as yours
I would be willing to risk my all-
But guilt would haunt me by night and day,
If I allowed the flighted bird of my love fall.
Oh my soul has need of you
In ways mortal tongues fail to describe-
Yet never in your caring sanctuary
Can my heart abide.
How does one follow
What he wants to do
Without being viewed a "player"
And to his heart remain true?
Treachery, deceit, and lies
Cannot be viewed as the way;
For our relationship would self-destruct-
And pain would smother our souls everyday.
Until my change comes
I must to myself remain true-
Though saddened and perplexed,
I must face another day without you...