My Wife Loves Me Right?
by Nicole Smith-Kirnon
Marriage is a funny thing; if you do not take the time to realize what you have and appreciate it for what it is, your reality will go unnoticed. My husband and I recently had a discussion about our relationship. You’ll go through the good and the bad, however I like to say we recently went through a rough spot. He explained it to me like this:
He stated to me, "Babe are you listening?" I said yes and he asked, "But did you hear me."
He stated to me, "Babe do you believe in me?" I said yes and he "You don’t show it."
There are times I am beyond stubborn and my attitude can be unbearable and I said "You know what, I am done."
My husband looked at me and said "The only thing that is done is this conversation." He began to speak in poetic form and he said:
"My wife cooks my food………….She loves me right?"
"My wife cleans the house and takes care of the kids……………she loves me right?"
"Every time we argue she’s ready to give up…………………she loves me right?"
"At the time I need her most she’s not here…….She Loves Me…….. Riiiiiiiight!!!!!"
It takes something like that to open my eyes. When I thought I was being a wife and doing my part; I was being a wife on the surface. There is more than being a wife than cooking and cleaning. There’s hearing and listening, loving and laughing, understanding and respecting, most importantly being friends first and communicating. I love my husband yet I didn’t love my husband right. My husband is my strength, my best friend and I could never ask for anyone better than him. His words opened my eyes. I now have a better understanding of what a wife is and not who a wife should be. It was once easy to say it’s over because in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship, it has to lead some where either marriage or it has to end. For us, it led to marriage. It’s easy to say let it end. My husband is my foundation and as he states it I loved him like a boyfriend. What does this mean? Well loving him like a boyfriend meant it was easy saying it is over and not look back. Loving him with my guards up and not give him all of me fearing he would be another man in my life to hurt me.
With these words my husband was understood. Today as I search to become a better me; I will live as a woman, love as a wife, respect my husband as my friend and love him as a man. We have passed the boyfriend/girlfriend stage which has led us to marriage. I will be here for him as a friend but I will love him as my husband. Babe thanks for opening my eyes. I love you, you are my inspiration for all the pieces that I do. To relive my past is to love you as a boyfriend, to love you as my husband I must first love you as a man.
(This is a piece mostly expressed by my husband).