No Longer a Virgin

by B.T. Bonner

I walked a thin line
drawn deep in the sand
one day away from beatings
and 1/3 less a man
a virgin in a classroom
filled with filthy people
who stole the best part of me
and told me I was not equal
on my knees I cried for blessings
that never came
and instead of being my sunshine
you became my rain
I was barely enough for myself
but broke my back to please you
and died when you screamed the "N" words
mama swore to me were not true
but those days of pain
have long since passed
for I am no longer the virgin mind
you raped in your class
the questions I asked
you met with aggression
when I needed your leadership
and a mental connection
now I am an educated warrior
with a silver tongue sword
made of all of the elements
you feared at the blackboard
trying to reinvent something that you made
flawed and f*cked up from the first grade
with an unfair criteria I could not meet
and a bunch of twisted facts I could not compete
too black and too ugly me
born young but not free
my notebook stained with the blood
of a thousand playground knees
and the voices of a dozen other teachers
that also lied to me
reports on Marcus and Martin
were met with F's, D's
and my midterm about Malcolm X
received the all time favorite..."See Me"
I prayed prayers in silence
as the Pledge of Allegiance resounded aloud
and sat alone at lunchtime
instead of the white's only crowd
Creating an oasis
of imaginary black friends
that listened when I spoke
and laughed when I grinned
I am no longer the virgin
of a scholastic caste
because I've Unlearned that History
and Relearned my Past

No Longer a Virgin by B.T. Bonner

© Copyright 2001. All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be duplicated or copied without the expressed written consent of the author.

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